Cage Match 2010, Round 1: 2) Cthulhu versus 31) Lyra Silvertongue

 

Cthulhu.jpg

Image courtesy of Dominique Signoret

Lyra.jpg

Image courtesy of New Line Cinema

Cthulhu
Great Old One
Age: ??
Race: ??
Weapons / Artifacts: None
Special Attack: Drives all who see it to insanity

Lyra Silvertongue
Little girl
Age: 12
Race: Human
Weapons / Artifacts: Alethiometer
Special Attack: Talks a lot
Advantages

  • Unfathomably huge–like, the size of a mountain
  • Inpires madness and terror in all who see it
  • Is an elder being
Advantages

  • Can talk to her own soul
  • Can read the alethiometer
  • Extremely clever and persuasive
Disadvantages

  • Might still be dreaming in R’lyeh
Disadvantages

  • Is a child
How we think the fight will go

As Lyra stands on a cliff overlooking the ocean, a vast shadow begins to rise from the deep. Her hair whipping around her face, she raises the alethiometer, its dials spinning frantically as she tries to make a reading, any reading, about what will happen… but for once, the compass is useless. Pantalaimon whimpers from her coat pocket as the shadow swells, becoming first the size of a great ship, and then a mountain; and then a great wave reaches the shore, smashing the cliff face like a fist and sending fifty feet of rock tumbling into the water. Lyra’s eyes widen, and she looks up, and up, and up, and the Elder One opens its own eyes and fixes her with its ancient gaze from beyond the stars of any world she has known. Lyra drops to her knees and begins to weep as Pantalaimon writhes, withers, and collapses. Cthulhu is no longer fhtagn.

And then Cthulhu steps on her head.

Predicted Winner: Cthulhu

(Cthulhu is a character from the myriad writings of H. P. Lovecraft; Lyra Belacqua is a character from Philip Pullman’s His Dark Materials trilogy.)

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